Friday, May 9, 2014

What if Your Biggest "Flaws" Aren't Flaws at All?

We are our own worst critics.  I know I am. 

I wonder what you see when you look at the below pictures...because I see the same giant flaw in all of them:

 
 
 
 
 
 
That horribly crooked front tooth!!
 
I am actually really self conscious about my left front tooth which is quite askew.  In every close up picture this is always what I see first about myself and I don't like it!  I prefer pictures that are far away so you can't see the offending molar :/
 
[It's my own fault this tooth is crooked. I wore braces and had beautifully perfect teeth for a short time.  And then like the stubborn teenager I was, I absolutely refused to wear my retainer and lo and behold, my teeth moved back to their old positions.  Ahh, youth is wasted on the young, eh? ]
 
I'm sure we all have things about ourselves that we don't like, or are self conscious of, in terms of our bodies, our personalities, our abilities, etc etc.  I used to be much more critical of myself in all of these areas but have become better through the years.  However, there are still many things I haven't fully accepted.  It's kind of embarrassing to say that - I mean I wish I could be one of those people who loves everything about themselves regardless of flaws, but I'm just not there yet.
 
If only I could be as confident as fellow Girls Gone Sporty Ambassador Brooke Birmingham!  Have you seen her blog post regarding her interaction with Shape magazine that went viral this week?  Her personal blog is apparently down because of all the traffic but the story was picked up by every major news network in the past two days.  Link to the story here.
 
Anyway, getting back to the tooth.  The reason I bring this up is because recently I've had a number of people out of the blue remark on how much they love my smile.  Most of them were people I didn't know, or didn't know well.  After the first few, I admitted to the Universe, 'ok I get it'.  I was on the receiving end of yet another message. 
 
I read an article recently on MindBodyGreen, which of course I can't find now, that said something along the lines of other people not noticing our mistakes nearly as much as we think they do.  This is so true.  Most of the time when we are having a 'bad hair day', or think we say something stupid, or any of a million other possible 'failures' throughout the day, no one else notices!  We are all usually too tied up in our own heads thinking about what we're doing wrong to notice small 'imperfections' in others.  And people who love us especially, tend to only see beautiful things, despite our flaws.  If only we could look at ourselves through the eyes of those that love us.
 
I guess what I'm trying to say is the things you may think are 'flawed' about yourself, may be the things that are actually the most unique and beautiful.  When I sat down to think about it I realized I smile a lot throughout the day.  I smile and laugh all day long with the kids.  I always flash a quick smile with strangers I make eye contact with - at the grocery store, runners and walkers I pass outside, people in cars that I let in front of me in traffic. 
 
A smile is a way to express your joy and happiness to the world, but even as I'm doing that I'm sometimes thinking about how my smile probably looks flawed because of that tooth.  But the Universe has just shown me (multiple times) that's not the case.  Well, if others don't see it, then I'm going to try not to as well.  From now on, I'm going to try to see the beauty and meaning behind that smile, instead of focusing on a misplaced tooth!
 
Happy Weekend everyone!
 
 
How about you?  Are you self critical?
 
Are there things you are self conscious about that others love about you?!



16 comments:

  1. So incredibly self critical but I'm working on that! In fact, read my post for today.

    Great minds :)

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    1. Hi Jill! I loved your post as well. Why are we so hard on ourselves? If only we could treat ourselves with the love that we treat others!

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  2. What a good reminder! And just so you know, I starred at your beautiful photos for a while thinking, "Okay, so what flaw am I supposed to be seeing??" because I just saw beauty and joy. We really are our worst critics. I've also been woken up to these misperceptions recently.

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    1. Awww Kelly that is so sweet, thank you for saying that! When I look at other people I never pick out tiny flaws like this, I have no idea why I do it to myself!

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  3. I wouldn't say that I am self critical but I am self-pressure-ical, if you know what I mean. I put more pressure on myself in the here and now that I do in pictures and appearance-wise (though I would say it used to be the other way around). And I think they are both as self defeating as the other, but they also help us to learn how we can continue to grow.

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    1. Hi Susie! I hear what you're saying. I used to be a hard core perfectionist and put immense pressure on myself in every possible situation. I'm glad I've gotten over most of that, but I still have a lot of picky and comparative tendencies when it comes to life achievements, and just who I am in general.

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  4. I didn't even notice the tooth as I looked at the photos until I read you point it out. Maybe I was too distracted appreciating your big curly hair! I recently wore a new combination of an outfit to work, and wasn't sure how I felt about it yet. I got SO many compliments! I walked away from that day realizing how important it is for us to give each other sincere compliments. It takes a village, you know? We can all work hard internally at accepting and loving ourselves, but it really does do wonder when people close to us - or strangers even! - pay a meaningful compliment. Let's lift each other up!

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    1. Oh that is really sweet Larissa, thank you! I totally agree with you about complimenting others. Its one of my favorite things to do because I know how great it makes people feel!

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  5. Oh my goodness, I was that teen too. Wore braces for 4 years after having most of my teeth pulled and jaw widened just to have everything go back cause retainers are lame. I decided to get Invisalign a few years ago, I may not wear the retainer every night, but knowing I paid for most of it, I wear it at least 4-5x a week.

    I love telling strangers I like their bag/coat/scarf, whatever. We don't do a good job of being nice to other people let alone compliment them.

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    1. Oh I have considered Invisalign too! If I ever have the funds to do that, I think I will and make sure I wear my retainer this time around! haha I love that you compliment strangers!

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  6. When I read this post I cried and laughed at the same time! I have a front tooth that is slightly longer than the other and in every picture I take, that is the FIRST thing I see! Everyone who knows me now, knows that I have a "good side"!! Thank you for making me feel better about MY flaw!

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    1. Ahhh!! We are twins! I feel your pain but I bet I wouldn't even notice your tooth if I met you. I'm sure my mind would solely be on my own crooked smile!! I'm glad my post helped you to feel better and see there are others out there JUST LIKE YOU!

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  7. Yep, very self critical {especially about my short legs} and when I do "selfies" I keep thinking I need to go and get that darn botox done LOL, then I realize I just need to embrace what God wanted me to look like and be happy..great post Jill :)

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    1. Awwww. I have short legs too! Shorties unite! I agree with you - we were all made special and unique. We should celebrate that we are not like anyone else!

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  8. That smile has only given me happiness!! In all these years i've never seen anything flawed in you, and never will!

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    1. Oh Lesle. You are too kind to me. You know to me you are perfect as well. Someone I always looked up to and hoped I could be like.

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